Wednesday, June 19, 2013

The Furniture Shop

The Furniture Shop is simpy the place all people will go to purchase their furnitures and home accessories. The shop have all kinds of items to make any cave, swamp, haunted house or any other homes a touch of the paranormal and incompletion. Check out the Furnitures.

Note: All wooden furnitures are made from haunted woods. Other matherials are either cursed, left to rot or specially pulverised to suit the interior deco.

Spider Wardrobe
A wooden wooden wardrobe made of 50 year old haunted wood from the trees of Bala Stella School. This wardrobe is carved into the shape of a tarantula by Magaret Tarantula, using the Maureen Saw. The wardrobe will automatically shower anyone ,who opens the doors, with all kinds of spiders. Please do not worry about the wardrobe running out of spiders because the curse laid by Miss Magaret Tarantula will automatically produce endless waves of spiders and tarantulas within your wardrobe to keep your clothes safe from moths and other clothes-eating critters. Just remember to pluck the 8 legged thingies out of your clothes before you wear them. This piece of furniture will be the greatest item in any critter lover's collection.

Note: suitable for people who use spiders in cooking, potion making or spell casting. recommended for people who have extreme phobia of spiders to help them to die of fright. Not suitable for couples who have children, for fear of kids eating and choking on the spiders.

cost: $423.09
The Mirror
Note:Cursed. claimed the lives of 23 vainpots, 8 bimbos, 5 sluts, 13 bitches and 12 models

disclaimer:look at your own risk.

A mirror deliberately shattered into 7 pieces with a sledgehammer to curse it with purest bad luck and misfortune to bestow onto the lucky owner of this piece of art. The broken mirror is then later cursed by the evil stepmother of Snow White, to tell the user how ugly he/she looks. The mirror also possesses a little bit of the charateristics of the wicked witch, so that the user can argue with with mirror when bored at home, or else one can practice a presentation infront of it and be rewarded with the snidest remarks and acidic insults. This accessory come in hand-held, hang-on-the-wall and full length size. However, this product is not suitable for vain people as the mirror will drive them insane or to death within 1 day.

Cost: price is negotiable. price should be around $239.56. bargain
Snow White's Four Poster Bed
The very bed where a ditched Snow White committed suicide by suffocating herself to death with a NTUC plastic bag tied over her head, when she failed to die after drinking Dettol, Dynamo, Mama Lemon and bleach. This cursed and exotic bed is much sought after by bed lovers. This exquisite bed is made of rotten wood polished with car wax to perfect shinyness, togther with swear words carved under the bed, but with an ancient inscription carved onto the head of the bed by Snow White using her fingernails. All the previous occupants have recommended others to buy this bed as you will feel a pleasant strangling sensation around the neck or sometime feel the pains of physical abuse when the spirit is feeling cranky.

Cost: $755.66
Mrs. Koh's Chopping Board.
Made from the wood of the famous execution block of King Louis who used it to decapitate his wives. This chopping board was used by Mrs. Koh, the famous student murderess, to slice, dice, chop, hack, cut, slash, stab and skewer her student victims, although the chopping board was used on weekends to chop vegetables and chicken. Fortunately, Mrs. koh met her demise at her favourite chopping board when she fell asleep, chopping herself to death without her knowing. This antique will make a fine addition to any kitchen, giving it the menacing aura of a slaughterhouse. Using this chopping board, the user will never miss the targeted mark on any living thing placed on it. The spirit haunting the board will ensure 100% accuracy and 100% destruction of the thing placed on it.

Cost: $29.00
Rocking Chair
This rocking chair of unknown origin just appeared suddenly infront of the shop. It seems like the chair rocked itself to the shop. After a round of interrogation with the chair, it seems like the chair is eager to have new victims. And so we, being the good souls, placed the rocking chair on sale. This rocking chair is carved from a rare species of haunted haunted wood from the Very Haunted Woods. This wonderful chair had rocked 6 people out of the chair with a powerful force tht send them flying straight out of their windows, causing them to smash into nearby buildings or trees, or simply slide onto the road and et steamrollered by rampaging vehicles. we guarantee death or permanent disability within 4 days of purchase or we refund $0.10 back to you.

Cost: $97.50

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