Sunday, January 17, 2010

NEWS FLASH

(Macarena Temple) Freaktopia – the Urban Geek have decided to retreat into the Ancient Tomb and train herself to become a summoner and bring Piece to the fragmented lands of Freaktopia. Freaktopians, the Other Realm and the United Emirates of Indian Cuisine Nations (UEICN) were shocked by her decision but nevertheless, they supported it.

Urban Geek made the decision to embark on the tough and perilous journey of a summoner due the re-emergence of the Leech (after a billion year banishment, and unfortunate birth of its toilet spawn) and the rise of the TFM sect, as their mere presence were capable of causing the citizens of the Other Realm to turn in their graves and their leaky auras of poverty are plunging economies after economies into irrecoverable bankruptcy; resulting in uncountable cases of insanity, murders, kidnap, blackmail, arson, suicides, genocides, civil wars, world wars and all other assorted catastrophes breaking out all over the place like pimples, acne and rashes on Mark Lee’s moon-cratered face.

Several royal advisers and misfortune-tellers have voiced their suspicion that the Al Thosai and Dhal Kingdom are being manipulated by the Leech and the TFM, much to the Princess Mutabak’s annoyance as she gave the oh-I-knew-it-500000-years-before-you-even-open-your-mouth expression at a press conference in Waffles Hotel (Sinkapoor).

While the Urban Geek is training in Macarena Temple, the Duck Medium will be embarking on his pilgrimage from Mount Pra’s Prata Temple to Saint Mutabak Temple in Mount Ro. “Well, if the pilgrimage does not work out, I will simply blast that obnoxious and noxious pair of sinful organisms to their kingdom come,” said Princess Mutabak curtly as she was busy disciplining Whisky, the only living thing on Freaktopia that is capable of causing nightmares, sore throats (from yelling ‘shut up!’ every 0.5 seconds) and flared tempers to the royal family .

Reported by Foreign Correspondent Miss Lim Ko Pi (currently in Freak Tock Seng Hospital's mortuary)

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