Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Auntie Poopie Sweet Dessert Shop

Fancy some refreshing, sugary treat? Then come down to Auntie Poopie’s Sweet Dessert Shop, tucked in a little back alley behind 11-7 along Heavenly Avenue 3. Auntie Poopie currently offers several different tantalizing types of dessert, each indescribably smooth and yummy, and not to mention heaped with tons of sugar (literally!).

In fact, every customer walks away turning diabetic and in need of CPR for their sugar shock. Auntie Poopie has collaborated with the Soup Expert Meng Po to come up with 3 special limited edition desserts to send more people off to the other realm (it’s actually a scheme by the government of the Other Realm to import more foreign talents to boost the population numbers).

Please take a look at the limited edition menu below and make your last order.

1) Sahara dessert

The most powerful of the lot, the Sahara dessert is made of desert sand flavored sugar to give you that dry, barren sensation and makes you feel as if you are standing on the Sahara desert itself. Topped with a few drops of rainwater harvested from the holy SSW Mountains in the Hombalaya region, you will experience a sense of nirvana as you swallow every mouthful of the sinful and exotic sandy sugar. You could request for extra Desert Storm flavoring to enhance the deserted feeling and experience the implosive sand plumes exploding all the way from your mouth to the anus, destroying everything in its path and leaving your internal organs in a mangled, bloody mess.

Price: $100 per bowl.
Offer!: 5% Discount from Freak Tock Seng Hospital to clear up your minced organs.

2) Just dessert

Inspired by Mdm Karma Lama’s preaching (“Worthless people blame their karma.”), Auntie Poopie has come up with an innovative new flavor – Just dessert. Piled with sins and wickedness in the form of sugars and chocolates and calories, the Just dessert will certainly appeal to all worthless people and help bring them some worth by sending them off to the Other Realm in advance where they can become cheap labor in the construction of Princess Murtabak’s new Murtabak Mansion on Beverly Mountains.

Price: $80 per bowl

3) Gobi dessert

This Asian-style dessert has its influences from ancient China and Mongolia. The Gobi dessert consists of Gobi desert sand-favored sugar and drenched in spoonfuls of Melanin-tainted milk and topped with generous servings of whipped, caned and tortured cream. An optional ingredient is marshmellow-flavored frost for the times when Gobi desert experiences its cold seasons. If you’re lucky, you may dig out some dinosaur fossils from your bowl of Gobi dessert but keep it low unless you want the Holy Immortal SSW to appear out of nowhere and steal your dessert.

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